What do we have left except our time?
I try and reach to you, but silence is my only find.
Everything is gone except memories and years…
Even when you’re home I’m wasting moments in tears.
I don’t hear you, because so often you yell
I zone out to deal, and you get angry and tell…
Me I can’t do anything right anymore
I’m the reason you’re always angry for.
We don’t hug or kiss, and you always look at me in discuss.
I used to have Saturdays now you just fuss.
No making love just a distance between two
With some good memories I once knew.
You don’t hear me either so we argue about what I didn’t say.
It’s getting harder to look forward to another day.
I’ve always said tomorrow has to be better so just make it through,
But now it seems I’m walking on egg shells no matter what I do.
I try to look into your eyes, but there so empty and cold.
If I broke down tomorrow I don’t think you’d hold…
On to me telling me it will work out.
I need some comfort in between all this doubt.
Even I can only hold so much in before I burst,
And the loneliness is becoming a deadly thirst.
Sometimes is as if the darkness has swallowed me
Hope is something I just don’t see.
I tare my skin till it bleeds without knowing,
But when sores appear I realize the stress is showing.
I bite inside my lip to feel some other pain
And relieve some emotion before going insane.
Sometimes I wish I could just scream till it was all out
Wondering if this is what 17 yrs. together is about.
All I want is to be embraced
With a loving glow upon your face,
But something tells me you’re no longer here
And every past reality I avoided is now my worst fear.